i trapped 899 people inside a giant labyrinth i created

i think the title explains it all

Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve dreamed of constructing a giant labyrinth. I used to draw elaborate mazes¹ on napkins during family dinners, dreaming of one day building one big enough to wander in forever. I’ve spend days rabbitholing on the topic of catacombs. But I’m just not a dreamer. I’m a doer.

So here’s how I made my dream - of constructing a giant labyrinth and putting a bunch of people in it - a reality.

For some context, every year my friends and I orchestrate an elaborate, month-long scavenger hunt called Pursuit. “Scavenger hunt” hardly encapsulates it, it’s more like an immersive art, alternate reality game that hypnotizes the good people of San Francisco to devote a month of their lives to following our every command. 1.5% of SF plays it.

Past missions included finding and tuning in to hidden super-local radios, whispering a secret word at a bakery for a fortune cookie with a clue inside, chasing down a car from a livestream, and scaling a hill to scour for letters painted in the distance.

And it’s 100% free to play. Created for the love of the game.

Two years ago, my mission started by decoding a limerick about a Yugoslavian Ex-Marine who did competitive birdwatching, which lead you to bookstores where I planted a book I wrote, Competitive Birdwatching for Yugoslavian Ex-Marines².

Last year, my mission started by solving a connect-the-dots. You drew between the dots to form a map of San Francisco, with an X-marks the spot.

clue (left), solution (right)

When you went to that spot, you discovered an art gallery with recreations of famous paintings with our character, Percy, in them.

you drew art with connect-the-dots, which led you to an art gallery :) paintings done by me and my very talented friends!!

Then you used the gallery program to decode the artwork.

This year, I wanted to think bigger, bolder. I jokingly suggested a giant labyrinth, drawing on my childhood aspirations, then thought - why would I not achieve my dreams? I believe in myself. I can do anything! Why should I restrain my creative spirit, why should I beat myself to the ground, let self-doubt spit upon me, and so easily give the world exactly what it wants?

Yet even as I mustered the courage to believe in myself, others doubted me.

Even people that I thought were my good friends, like Sam Sliman, betrayed me, expressing doubt that I would be able to construct my labyrinth.

Sam Sliman - a friend? or foe?

Here’s what Sam would look like as a horse, and here’s what Sam would look like as Mr. Beast³:

sam horse (left), sam beast (right) - made with animorpfp, of course

Perhaps it’s because I keep winning Sam’s Fake Pitch nights⁴ so hard that it embarrasses all the other contestants, and he resents this.

Oops! I did it again. I won fake pitch and received a comically large six figure check (six figures but going the opposite way).

All this to say, I wasn’t about to let the haters bring me down.

I spent basically all of the scheduled two months of Pursuit preparation figuring out how exactly to construct my labyrinth. Wood? PVC pipe? And where I could put it - labyrinths are pretty big, you know.

I had to stay within budget, I also couldn’t drill anything into the wall. So I landed on constructing the walls out of photo backdrop frames and a web of paracord strung to command hooks on the walls and wrapped around support columns. The walls had to be lightweight enough to not pull these hooks down, also, the heftier things are, the more expensive they tend to be, so I decided on sheer fabric.

By the fault of my own hubris, this project had gotten very much out of control, and I needed some serious manpower, so I put out a call on substack, instagram, twitter, and my sf schemes chat. And miraculously, people were down to clown.

I spent three days constructing the labyrinth with a gaggle of helpers, on the last day in an act of immense hubris I spent several hours working alone, and aggravated a prior strain, very badly re-injuring my hand.

Anyways.

Here’s the clue that led players to the puzzle location - can you figure out where to go?

do you see how you first solve a maze and then go inside a labyrinth hehheheh

Here’s a walkthrough of my labyrinth. Can you solve the puzzle?⁵

I also constructed a giant paper mache minotaur head, of course.⁶

taking thirst traps in the minotaur head

In the end, I successfully trapped almost a thousand people in my labyrinth, Sam Sliman formally apologized for doubting me, none of the labyrinth walls came horribly crashing down, labyrinth-construction-volunteers gleefully took turns chasing people around in the minotaur head, and all my wildest dreams came true.

POV: you see the minotaur from across the labyrinth, wyd? also, I haven’t paper mached since like kindergarten, so I really just banked on being able to figure it out a few days before, through the power of believing in myself

All this to say: the world will try to beat you down. And you can’t just take it. You have to fight back like a rabid dog to get what you deserve.

You will only accomplish as big as you dare to dream. You set your own ceiling of potential. If you aspire to nothing, if you’re not willing to take a leap of faith, and risk failure, then you will only achieve exactly what you aspired to: nothing.

I can already SMELL the comments comparing me to Mr. Beast, and let me just say, since I’m always one step ahead: Mr. Beast would have to pay 899 people 1 million dollars to get trapped inside his labyrinth.⁷ But me? I can get 899 people to do it for free. And thank me for it.

So, was constructing my labyrinth worth all the time, energy, and injury it took?

Objectively - no, not even close.

But am I so stubborn that, if I had to go back in time, I would choose to do it again and again nonetheless?

Yes, of course.

The moral of the story: NEVER doubt me, because not only will it be really embarrassing for you when I inevitably succeed, making you look like a huge idiot, you will also be banished from ever entering my labyrinth⁸ and regret it forever.

Also, with just a few dozen people who’re down to clown, anything is possible.

Love,

Danielle (𝓇𝒶𝓌 & 𝒻𝑒𝓇𝒶𝓁)

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Editor’s Note:

I couldn’t have accomplished my dreams without the help of ~40 volunteers, mostly strangers summoned from the internet. The number of volunteers was so incredibly heartwarming, especially as someone bad at asking for help. They also brought such great ideas I couldn’t have thought of alone. One guy literally came on crutches with a broken leg, and pulled out every single tool imaginable from his magical van, to aid many snags.

I had no idea how to repay these volunteers, I was just like, “Hey, I owe you big time, you can wear the giant minotaur head and chase people around the labyrinth if you’d like? I don’t know what else to offer you.” But people were just happy to contribute to a scheme :,)

If YOU want to be offered insane sidequests from time to time, follow me on instagram and twitter. And, of course, subscribe :)

In Outer news, my startup Outernet was featured in TechCrunch this week, and reached the top-downloaded chart on the app store for the first time last week :) I’m so excited about getting people to go out and explore!

Also, we hit 10,000 𝓇𝒶𝓌 & 𝒻𝑒𝓇𝒶𝓁 readers last week :,) love ya guys!

And as always, huge thank you to my paid subscribers for funding the mischief: Adam, Adler, Anne, Bathtime, Christina, Cori, Cristin, Cynthia, Dan, Eli, Emily, Erika, Erikka, Fanclau, Francesca, Gillian, Jade, Jeff, Jen, Jey, Joana, Jon, Judy, Kat, Lucy, Mariarita, Miranda, N.Y., Paige, Patrek, Patrick, Rebecca, Roland, Ryan, Sasha, Siena, Tamsin, Tanairi, Tomer, Wren, and Yush.

1. fun fact: the difference between a labyrinth and a maze is that a labyrinth has a singular, non-branching path to the center, whereas a maze has branches and dead ends. also, “labyrinth” just sounds way cooler.

2. my first time as a published author in bookstores! and yes, obviously I got permission from the bookstores. what a silly thought you had just there, questioning that.

3. I am obviously just joking around here and got Sam’s permission to post this

4. the competition where you pitch the best worst business ideas

5. please read this in a Dora the Explorer voice

6. paper mache is a lot like riding a bike, in that I vaguely remember that I did it in like kindergarden, and could kinda just remember how to do it from muscle memory

7. Last to Leave the Labyrinth wins $1 MILLION! *MR BEAST FACE* Last to Not Get Eaten By The Minotaur Wins $1 MILLION! *MR BEAST FACE*

8. or whatever it is that I’m cooking up at the moment